What is burnout?

Burnout is a combination of exhaustion, negativity and loss of efficacy brought on by unrelieved stress. While a natural cycle of short-term stress and adequate recovery can generally be tolerated (and in a best-case scenario can lead to personal growth), persistent and unrelieved stress can run you down, leading to a loss of motivation.

This can lead to the feeling - and eventually to the visceral conviction - of pointlessness, thinking that nothing you can do will change the world or your life. At this point, challenges become unmanageable, and external stressors have created inner burnout.

What are the symptoms of burnout?

At its core, burnout is about persistent emotional and mental exhaustion. This can show up in many ways. Let’s explore some

12 things you didn’t know could be symptoms of burnout:

1. Mornings feel increasingly difficult

You may not be the earliest of risers, but you’ve noticed that getting out of bed in the morning is becoming increasingly difficult. Whereas before you might have hopped up at the sound of your alarm, now you’re very familiar with the snooze button. You may spot that waking up is particularly difficult at certain times of the week, perhaps even with regular work commitments, such as meetings and presentations, or at the start of the week when your to-do list is looming over your head.

2. You’ve lost your sense of excitement

It could be for the work that you do, or for your hobbies, but if you’ve noticed that your excitement and enthusiasm for things has been dulled, this could be a sign of burnout. It might feel like apathy, or you could disengage entirely, but if you find yourself struggling to muster the passion and creativity that you once had, think back and see if you can decipher when this first started being a problem for you. Does it line up with any other periods of stress or heightened workload?

3. Becoming cynical of your, or others’, work

Previously, you may have started your day and approached tasks on your to-do list with a positive attitude, but now there is a layer of cynicism covering your mood. Perhaps things that never bothered you before now feel like deal-breakers, or you no longer feel satisfied with the work you’re doing. Rather than taking this as a sign that your role no longer works for you, could this instead be linked to burnout and overworking?

4. Physical pain

From headaches to muscle aches, did you know that mental health problems can sometimes manifest themselves in physical pain? When it comes to burnout, you might experience pain caused by holding a lot of tension in your body. On the other hand, chronic pain can also be another thing added to our mental load, making for a vicious cycle. However, if you have noticed an increase in headaches, or other bodily pain, it’s always worth speaking with your GP.

5. Small decisions feel difficult to make

What are you going to have for dinner? What outfit should you put on? What do you want to watch on TV? They’re only small decisions, but you just can’t muster the energy to make your mind up. This could be linked to a sense of apathy that is creeping into the rest of your life, or it could simply be your mind’s way of telling you that it’s overwhelmed, and no longer has the capacity to take on additional decisions that would usually take no effort at all.

6. Trouble getting started on tasks

You’ve managed to drag yourself out of bed, and are about to get started with the day’s jobs, when suddenly you realise you don’t know where to begin. Perhaps you’re experiencing something similar to brain fog, and you’re trying hard to ground yourself but, for all your efforts, you can’t see a clear path forward. A to-do list, or a catch-up with your manager to work out priorities, might help you here, but the underlying problem could run deeper.

7. You’ve begun to procrastinate

That task has been sitting on your to-do list for days now, but every time you decide to get stuck in, you instead find yourself picking up your phone, starting up a conversation with someone – or even focusing on a different, less important job altogether. If this sounds familiar, are there any patterns to this behaviour? Do you find you put off certain kinds of tasks more than others?

8. You feel prickly and irritable

Whatever it may have been, you’ve found the straw that broke the camel’s back, and you can’t keep your irritation in any longer. It might have been something really small, or perhaps a series of things, but you’ve snapped. Take a moment to think, is this something that would have bothered you normally? Was there a just cause to feel frustrated? Or has your reaction been over-the-top, or out of character?

9. You’re experiencing low mood or depression

In very basic terms, one of the key differences between stress and burnout is that stress can lead to an increase in anxiety, whereas burnout can lead to depression. Low-mood may show itself in many different ways, but will often touch you in the experiences we’re describing here. It may not be easy, it will probably take some time, and you may have to make some big lifestyle changes, but know that burnout is something that affects many people, and is also something that can be overcome.

10. Your achievements don’t mean as much to you

Over time, we might find ourselves in a more settled place, or at a point where we value certain kinds of achievements over others. But if you notice a sudden change in the way that you react to your workplace achievements, this could be a sign that you’re experiencing burnout, and have lost the sense of value that you once had in your role.

11. You’re carrying a sense of dread

Whether it’s Sunday night anxiety, or intrusive anxious thoughts whirling around your head, if you’re experiencing a sense of dread that wasn’t there before, this is something to take seriously and to make a note of. You could try journaling, or using a mood tracking app, so that you can build up a bigger picture of what you’re going through. This can then be really helpful if you decide to speak to a professional, and want to help them understand what your experience has been so far.

12. Your relationships with others are becoming strained

It may be with friends, family, or colleagues, but something has changed between you. Are you usually a social person who enjoys spending time with others? Are messages now going unanswered and plans cancelled at the last minute? When going through any kind of mental health challenge, the people around us are key to feeling better, and so if you feel as though your relationships are suffering, this is a sure sign that it’s time to reach out for help.

In your attitude to work:

• Are you working more and enjoying it less?
• Do you have to force yourself to do routine activities?
• Are you lacking enthusiasm and/or constantly seeking excitement?
• Would you rather be elsewhere?
• Have you given up on your future plans?

In your coping mechanisms:

• Are you consuming alcohol more often?
• Are you using antidepressants and/or sleeping pills?
• Are you exercising yourself into injury?
• Is your need for coping mechanisms increasing?

In your physical health:

• Has your blood pressure gone up?
• Are you feeling run down and catching more bugs?
• Have you gained or lost weight?

In your relationships:

• Are you finding it harder to confide in others?
• Are you finding other people’s needs and expectations harder to manage?
• Have you lost joy in sexual intimacy?

How does burnout impact relationships?

Are you snapping at your partner, friend or colleague for no reason? Perhaps you're avoiding company because it’s interfering with your ability to focus on the important stuff, like work. Or you're finding that every work interaction feels like a battle?

Being under stress has an impact on your ability to relate to others. When your body is in fight-or-flight mode, it’s hard to start offering or receiving emotional intimacy with all the vulnerability that involves, or even to be civil to others. But emotional intimacy and support are one of the most important ways of recovering from stress and entering a burnout state where you can no longer access that support impairs your ability to recover from it, setting up a damaging loop. 

If someone in your life has changed their behaviour in worrying ways, or they're working harder and harder but closing down to companionship, letting them know that support will be there for them when they’re ready can be really helpful.

How can counselling help with burnout?

Counselling allows you to talk, and get your worries out of your head without fear of judgement, jumping to conclusions, or unsolicited advice. This differs greatly from other coping strategies you might have used before. Perhaps you’re used to dealing with your thoughts on your own as they go around in circles in your mind. Maybe you pull on your trainers to run them into the dust, or - self-defeatingly - distract yourself from your worries by working yet more hours.

The ability to talk about it may, in itself, bring a sense of relief. Counselling will not immediately solve your problems, but it can give you the space to no longer feel quite so stuck.

As you unpack your thoughts and concerns with your counsellor or therapist, you will get greater clarity about your needs and options, and you can start working on your recovery. You are also likely to gain a clearer awareness of your current burnout factors - both external (like work demands or relationship difficulties) and internal ones (like your reactions to stress or over-identification with work goals). All this will help you make the right decisions to take control of your future.

Sometimes, recovery from burnout leads to a kind of inner regrowth. It can be hard to let go of your old life goals or attitudes, even when they prove limiting or even damaging in your current world. But working with a counsellor can help you become more aware of unquestioned assumptions you may be holding about how to make yourself feel valued, and can help you find new goals and paths.

How can you prevent and recover from burnout?

In addition to seeking professional support, or if you don't quite yet feel ready to reach out to a counsellor, there are a number of self-care strategies that can help you to prevent and recover from burnout. Starting with the most immediate causes and effects:

Relaxation/mindfulness

There are many proven techniques for relaxing like mindfulness meditation, body scans, prayer, the practice of art or music, and moving meditations like yoga and tai-chi. Which one do you find most appealing?

Exercise

While it can be taken to unhelpful extremes, exercise is good at burning off some of the stress hormones in our bodies. Walking, running, dancing, and the slower forms such as yoga, tai-chi all help here. Remember to finish your exercise at least three hours before bed, in order for it to assist - rather than challenge - your sleep.

Sleep

It is well known that stress can impact sleep levels and quality, while insufficient sleep can increase stress levels. This can also be a major factor in burning out. In fact, according to one study, too little sleep (less than six hours) was identified as the primary risk factor for burnout.

Take sleep seriously - aim to get more than six and a half hours of sleep a night. Exercise between three to six hours before bedtime. Give yourself nice regular wake-up and bedtimes, with an hour of calm or 'wind-down' before bed. If you’re tired during the day, ask yourself if you’re getting enough sleep.

Social support

Your friends, families and even colleagues can all help you navigate and survive the stresses of work. Just like sleep, stress can damage your social relationships which can, in turn, increase your stress levels. Making time to care for your relationships may feel like another demand when you’re already experiencing stress, but these relationships can act as a buffer against it. 

Boundaries

How can you give your best self in a sustainable way? The answer is in setting boundaries that allow you to recover from work stress and manage the whole of your life in the way that you need.

Don’t over-commit. What do you need to do just to do your job well, as opposed to pleasing other people? Thinking of which, are you a people pleaser - reluctant to say 'no' for fear of conflict? How would your life improve if you were a little more confident about letting people know what you need?

Look after yourself. What do you need to do to recover from the stress of the day, week or month? How do you decompress - is it exercise, music, cooking, or a nice hot bath? Whatever it is, take time to find the tools that work best for you. 

If you’re not reserving the time and energy you need for relaxation, exercise, sleep, social support and whatever else you need to manage your stress levels, think about what boundaries you need to enforce to permit burnout avoidance and recovery.

Further help

Remember, these feelings of exhaustion, negativity and failure are not you, they’re the symptoms of burnout, and you really can recover from it.

Watch out for burnout risk factors and warning symptoms and, if necessary, look at what boundaries you are or are not respecting, and think about how to improve them. If you find it hard to enforce boundaries because of your own values or personality, if you find yourself coming back to burnout situations like a moth to the candle, or if you have been signed off work but the stress isn’t lifting, consider working with a counsellor or accessing further support.